Recently, after a particularly emotionally exhausting and trying time, a sweet friend made a valuable suggestion to me.
As women and as mothers (for those of us who are mothers), we have such constant demands on us and on our time; if we work outside the home, the stress of "what needs to be done at home" is nagging in the back of our minds, and if we are busting our backsides working in the home, it's easy to wish we could just walk away for a while and talk to an adult about something other than "house stuff." But SOMEone always needs SOMEthing, so we feel like we can't really get anything done! And then we wonder if we matter (maybe that's self-pity.....?).
So my friend suggested that I put "three anchors" into my day. This means that every morning, every afternoon, and every night, I do something that helps me calm myself down and bring what I need to do into sharper focus. Different people might have different anchors, but this is what I TRY to do: 1) in the morning, I work out for 30 minutes or so....it might take longer on strength-training days...this helps me think more clearly, I believe....2) in the afternoon, when the kids are napping/resting, I take some time to read or just chill....usually this is when I do my quiet time....3) in the evening....well, let's just say it's a work in progress....I've never actually managed to do anything in the evening yet. My girlfriend takes a bubble bath. That sounds good in theory!
Maybe tonight will be different, though.